Chasing Jesus

Ministry Coaching Minute #2

2009-02-05T15:09:00.004-06:00

What I want to share with everyone is something that I think is absolutely important to us as leaders in a church. God has chosen all of us to be the people he uses to facilitate what Torch is. When I first came to Torch a little over a year ago, the one thing that stood out to me and impressed me most was the sense of community that Torchers had. I felt welcomed and even grafted in to the body the very first time I attended! It was incredible! I remember thinking to myself on the drive home how incredibly hard it usually is to pull off community at such a level.

Well, what we’re going to talk about today I think really captures that. In regards to community, on Monday nights, or at Mini-Church, or even functions, I want all of us to read, understand, and practice this one simple statement: Belonging leads to Believing which then leads to Becoming.

I’ve shared this already with our Mini-Church leaders and now I want to share this with all of the leaders. It is so VERY important that we go out of our way to welcome people into the community. It’s important to begin the process of belonging, believing, and becoming. I know that sometimes it’s not the easiest thing in the world to cross the room and talk to a total stranger but please keep this in mind: God has ordained and orchestrated their attendance at Torch and it would be almost ludicrous for us not to EMBRACE that and pursue new people. Think about that. Newcomers might be stopping in for the first time because they were just driving by and they heard something/someone tell them to stop in. God is constantly calling people towards Himself! He’s doing that by bringing people to 1966 Hawley St. in Mundelein.

Do you see how important it is to rise above our fears of crossing the room and just getting there and initiating the conversation? God is walking people through our doors every week and asking us to care for His children—isn’t that amazing!!!

Can I challenge all of you this coming week (and every week) to be bold and wildly on-fire to talk to newcomers and even regular attenders that aren’t connected?

--Brad Gross, Associate Pastor

Ministry Coaching Minute #1

2009-01-07T13:59:00.001-06:00

I was reading an article on CNN today that was nothing more than an article offering advice to major politicians. The author, Ed Rollins, shared several great axioms of leadership in his article and I want to share a few of them here as well as throw in a some others. I changed up some of the wording of Rollin’s quotes to make them more ministry-minded. Enjoy!

To Torch Leaders:

Choose to pursue DEEP spiritual health/devotional life
Guide, Don’t dictate
Make your co-leaders your allies, serve your members, and be fair & just with those who may be out of line.
Our actions carry a heavy consequence; it’s imperative that we work hard, make careful decisions, be strategic & think long term
Despair in leadership comes when we’re leading in our own abilities
Leadership is not about leading & following, it’s about empowering people to LEAD
BETTER MINISTRY IS BETTER THAN MORE MINISTRY
See opportunities, not obstacles

Hope you enjoyed these and I pray that they’re a real benefit to you and the ministry God is calling you all to be a part of!

this delicate dance between grace and love

2008-11-02T11:11:00.001-06:00

It's been quite a week, hasn't it, Torch?

I've been thinking a lot lately, about this delicate dance between grace and love.

"...all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus." (Romans 3:23-24) This is the truth and the gospel - we have all completely screwed up on any number of levels, and worse: we, without Christ, are "by nature objects of wrath" (Ephesians 2:3) - but there is grace and redemption and forgiveness and reconciliation because of Christ's death and resurrection, and this is good news!!

But sometimes I fear that in the name of love we do not speak the truth as clearly as we ought. That in the name of compassion we adopt this "I'm okay and you're okay" philosophy that looks and sounds so nice and kind, but is actually full of hell, because it's a lie. We are not okay, and we have never been okay - it is why Christ came and died for us. There was a price paid for our freedom! And to deny that we have needed that ransom is to deny love...

Hebrews 4:15-16 tells us that "we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet was without sin. Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need."

He gets it, this God of ours, that temptation to sin comes at us in a zillion different ways, because not only does He see it, but He's been there, on the receiving end. He didn't give in to it, but He knows what it feels like be in those situations, and He knows how to help us in our time of need. We can come to Him in confidence, knowing that we will find mercy and grace. Romans 8:26: "In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express." His heart is filled with compassion for us, and He receives us as we are.

But He does not leave us that way.

The Bible tells us, "Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will." (Romans 12:2) This is a process that takes cooperation between the Spirit at work in us (sanctifying us and making us more like Jesus) and we ourselves (choosing to allow Him to do it). It is not always easy, this becoming holy - it requires us to die to ourselves, and we do not always want to do that - and sometimes we want to but we don't want to but we do want to...

I love the way Peterson paraphrases this in the Message: "It happens so regularly that it's predictable. The moment I decide to do good, sin is there to trip me up. I truly delight in God's commands, but it's pretty obvious that not all of me joins in that delight. Parts of me covertly rebel, and just when I least expect it, they take charge. I've tried everything and nothing helps. I'm at the end of my rope. Is there no one who can do anything for me? Isn't that the real question? The answer, thank God, is that Jesus Christ can and does. He acted to set things right in this life of contradictions where I want to serve God with all my heart and mind, but am pulled by the influence of sin to do something totally different." (Romans 7:21-25)

And that's the thing - He acted to set things right. Because there were things that needed to be set right. And there are things that still do...

"Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. - 1 John 4:7-9

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. - 1 Corinthians 13:4-8

God is love - and love rejoices in the truth.

I did a word search on Bible Gateway, looking for that verse about speaking the truth in love, and it turned up a number of verses that taken together make it very clear that there is a deep correlation between truth and love. Not surprising, as the Word tells us both that God is love and that Jesus is the Way, the Truth, and the Life... (John 14:6)

Love will always tell you the truth. Paul tells us that "...speaking the truth in love, we will in all things grow up into him who is the Head, that is, Christ." (Ephesians 4:15)

I want that. I want Truth-speakers in my life who will tell me when I am getting it wrong, so that in all things I will grow up into Christ. And I want to be a Truth-speaker - not because of some self-righteous "I'm right and you're wrong" mentality - but because I love people and because I want to spend eternity with everyone.

The goal is godliness... the heart is love... and love does not lie to you and tell you that something wrong is okay when it isn't. It does not tell you, as you are walking into sin, that it's fine that you're doing it, because that's just where you are right now, and that everything's going to work out, and not to worry about it. It does not tell you that just because your situation is atrocious, that just because something horrible has happened to you, that you are justified in responding to it in an ungodly manner. Love turns and looks straight at that which would destroy it and continues to be love. ("Forgive them, Father, for they do not know what they are doing.")

God is love. He is also the source of life. And love values life - always.

About a week ago we started talking about "the abortion issue" at Torch, as we began praying for the upcoming election, and for God's kingdom to come and His will to be done on earth as it is in heaven. It has been a week of hard conversations and fervent prayer, and I have debated saying anything at all... but I cannot be silent. More than 50 million babies have been robbed of their destinies in this nation alone, and it is time for the bloodshed to stop. It is time for the Church to repent of her indifference and to do something about it. Our God can move mountains. He can heal our land.

He can also heal people.

There is grace. There is always, always, always grace. But "what shall we say, then? Shall we go on sinning so that grace may increase? By no means! We died to sin; how can we live in it any longer?" (Romans 6:1-2)

I had the incredible privilege of watching /participating in (via the Internet) a prayer meeting in San Diego, CA last night, led by Lou Engle. At one point in the night, we prayed a prayer together that many involved with Bound4Life have been praying already for months:

"Jesus, I plead Your Blood over my sins and the sins of my nation. God, end abortion, and send revival to America."

It is a simple prayer, and it is heartfelt. And I am so humbled to be allowed into God's throne room, to repent on behalf of my nation, and to plead for the mercy He so freely gives.

Podcasts

2008-08-12T06:47:00.003-05:00

Hey, everyone - Torch's messages are now available on ITunes - just search the store for "Torch Podcast" and it'll turn up in the list. They can also be found here.

Life

2008-08-11T22:51:00.004-05:00

Hey, my sister asked me to pray for a little girl named Life who's having some health complications. Life is the daughter of a friend of a friend and I've never met her or her parents but she could sure use some prayer. Here is a link to follow her story on.

http://www.aroyalallegiance.blogspot.com/

the final days in fiji

2008-07-15T03:24:00.001-05:00

well, exactly one week and two hours from right now, i'll be boarding a plane headed to LAX. that moment i believe is going to be bittersweet for me, probably more bitter. i don't want to leave fiji. this country has changed my life in so many ways, and i know an emotional reaction to a country is all part of the process of missions but there is so much work to do here and the people are so open to God's word. now is the time to act here and i don't want to leave.

through this whole fiji process, God has proven himself faithful over and over. providing the money for the trip, my passport, the people he's brought into my life on this trip, and the way he's orchestrated so many different events. i'm so humbled by this love and faithfulness, and how he can use someone so unworthy and incapable like myself.

i'm praying now that God would keep me from being an emotional mess when i get back to the states. i really don't want to leave, everywhere i go i meet people and they're openly friendly people. just today, i was leading a group on OJT. OJT stands for on the job training. i am given two people to teach how to share the gospel, and then we actually go out and they watch me do it.

today we were dropped off in front of a house, and thought, why not go into the house we were dropped off at. inside were two women, a mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. they invited us in happily and we began to sit and talk with them. once the conversation was directed towards God i saw God was presenting an opportunity to share His story with them. i began sharing the gospel with them and would stop and ask them if they had questions after each step. i was heartbroken each time as they would ask questions because they had been raised in different denominational beliefs or no church at all, and both were quite confused.

i shared my testimony and they both seemed moved, then i asked them if they wanted to know for sure that they would spend eternity with Jesus. they did, so we prayed and they accepted Christ. they were crying and i was trying not to, and they said that they would like to know how to share with their husbands who were lost. so before i left i tried to quickly teach them how to share the gospel with their husbands. they were so loving and honest with me it was amazing. i'll never forget them.

my point isn't to say, "hey look at me. look at what i did." my point is that i am nothing and look at what God can do with me, look at what he can do with each one of us. many of you know my story and the sin i came out of years ago, but yet God still wants me. instead of asking why like i used to, now i just let him. i want to encourage you all to do the same. instead of asking why do you want to use me or how can you use me, just let him. the time is now, not tomorrow. this world needs Christ and they're all crying out to him. this isn't just christian-cliche it's real.

God will take you places you never dreamed if you just begin surrendering to him, and give him your life fully. 5 months ago i had no idea and couldn't imagine being in another country, sharing the gospel with other people. but here i am because God wants me, and i can guarantee he wants you. maybe not in fiji or some other country, but where you are. do it.

i pray that you would seek him now and begin to figure out how you can begin to be used by God. i love you and miss you all.

Remember God's Loving Kindness

2008-07-14T10:37:00.003-05:00

Hello to all in my Torch Family-

I come to you as your brother, now experiencings God's loving kindness 400 miles away. Let me encourage you: the LORD's loving kindness is all around you, as it is Ash and I here. God is so amazing! He rewards faithful obedience.

As some of you may like to know, things went exceptionally well over the weekend. Our visit to the church assembled in the Cottonwood community was more than we could have ever asked for. We spent many hours laughing, playing ball, and meeting a wonderful community of people who desire to see God move in radical ways. One of the highlights for us was the time we got to share our heart with the students there. God has stirred in us a passion for Him that is driving our hearts as we move forward.

Small town America is a new experience for us as a couple, but it is one that reminds us of our Torch Family. Everyone is very caring, loving, and desires to be in relationship and build community. If God does move us into this community, we may be the new kids in town for some time, but we are far from outsiders. They welcome with open arms, arms that desire to be Jesus on a daily basis.

We praise God for the opportunity to share the weekend up here and look forward to what He has for us in the future. As for now, we sit here, with hearts extended to you. Our love for you is known and springs from God's loving kindness. Continue to seek Him out with radical surrender. Let nothing come between The God of Creation and His beautiful creation, which is you.

We pray that God's loving kindness will continue to foster a community of radical discipleship to the King of Heaven. Continue to make every effort to grow in God's grace. Let not the enemy take even a grain of the ground your Heavenly Father and Commander has given you. Continue to press forward, living off His Word, and take the Hill that He has placed before you. Do not lose heart when the battle is long, but be encouraged by the Spirit as you fall on your knees to seek His presence. Let your brothers and sisters in Christ be your encouragement. The Spirit speaks through each of you so that none of you may be overtaken by the enemy.

Our hearts long to see you again. We look forward to the time we shall celebrate what God is doing in you and in us soon.

Your brother and sister in arms-

Chris and Ashley

New Starbucks = New Lesson Learned

2008-06-12T08:02:00.002-05:00

So tonite, on my way to the grocery store, I noticed that the brand-new Starbucks just opened. I figured, what would go better with grocery shopping than a tall vanilla soy steamer? I stop in and place my order. It takes forever to get the drink. Mind you, I’m the only customer in the building and there are 3 people behind the counter with a 4th one on his way. So, I’m getting a little inpatient, saying things in my mind like,

“How long does it take to pump vanilla and steam soy?”
“How bout we train everybody then open the store?”
“Umm, the store will be closed by the time I get this thing…”

Absolutely rude of me, I know. As I was thinking all of that, the Holy Spirit reminded me of what my life looked like and what I was dealing with. New kid on the block at a new job that I’m probably not really qualified for. I basically have a job that requires accounting or finance experience–I have neither. And it’s pretty obvious I’m struggling. I’m way behind the curve and it’s been very discouraging. I’ve been very fortunate as everyone at work has really encouraged me.

So here I am; in the same boat as that poor barista behind the counter. The new guy, just learning the ropes, probably doesn’t have any experience and I have the gaul to be bitter, or angry, or hasty. I never said anything out loud, but the fact that I was thinking in my mind really forced me to evaluate how merciful and graceful I’m being with people around me. Is me being impatient and short-tempered SHOWING & LIVING OUT the love of Christ? Nope. Is my behavior lining up with the behavior of a person TRANSFORMED by grace? Nope. So I just began to think and ask for forgiveness. It’s been hard, but it’s funny that God would use something so close to my life, like a starbucks to teach me about mercy & grace & the love of Christ.

While at the grocery store I thought about the whole starbucks thing and how I was going to really keep striving to live grace & mercy out. I began to ask myself if I am living a life that is pouring out great measures of grace & mercy. I began to ask myself if my leadership was something that exuded grace & mercy. I began to ask myself if my heart was something that just wreaked of grace & mercy. The answer to all those questions was “nope”.

Today while at work I got the chance to share with a co-worker who God is and just quote scripture and see how scripture does such an amazing job at revealing who God really is. Moreso than my life ever will. I mean, it’s God’s word, it defends itself! I love it! But in that time of sharing, it really struck me how I have no place to condemn anyone as I am under the same condemnation without Christ. And even under the Grace of Christ, I too will stand before the throne of judgement…just like all of those who reject grace. It’s powerful.

All in all, I’m realizing that for most of my life I’ve been living in a religion that is Man-Centered and not God-Centered. For what is man? The Psalmist says, “Each man’s life is but a breath.”–Psalm 39:5

Off To Fiji!!

2008-06-07T15:40:00.004-05:00

Hey, everyone - for those of you who don't know, Josh and Cat are leaving for Fiji today!!! Please continue to pray for them over the next six and a half week as they travel and follow God's call for their lives this summer.

Josh and Cat will both be updating their blogs weekly, so to find out how they're doing, or to drop them a note, swing by their blogsites when you get a chance. Thanks! Their blogs can be found here:

Josh: A Cup And A Chair Far From Here
Cat: Turn Around

Loading...

2008-06-04T15:49:00.004-05:00

So if any of you saw this yesterday, there is actually content to it. It is rather ironic that this letter my wife wrote is entitled Loading... and we couldn't get her computer to actually post it. I guess it wasn't done loading. Anyways, here is Ashley's letter she wrote to her family that I believe her Torch family needs to read.

Good Morning Friends and Family,

I hope everyone is doing well. I know that its been a while since I’ve seen most of you but I just wanted to share something with you today. To start off, Chris and I are doing very well. We have finally settled into our apartment and are enjoying married life to its fullest. We can honestly say that this was the best decision we have ever made. We are growing closer to each other and to God everyday :) Chris is still looking for a full job as a pastor, but its seems as though our prayers are being answered because we have a new church every week calling for an interview. We are just waiting on God to put us in the right place. I don’t want to pull the wool over your eyes and say that everything has been peachy keen since the wedding, because it hasn’t, by far. We are learning what it means to be adults. Learning how to responsibly spend the little money that we have, learning how to live with each other, learning each others habits, wants, needs, and desires. Its been difficult but we know that we are growing :) But that’s not why I’ve emailed today. I feel something that God has put on my heart today that I would like to share with you. So here it is...

Part of being Christian is devoting time every day to sitting and “spending time with God” as we like to call it. This can mean anything, whether its reading the bible, listening to music, reading a Christian book or praying. I TRY to do this everyday, but that seems to be one of my struggles. Anyways, I got up this morning, with no real intention to sit and spend time with God. Oprah seemed a lot more interesting this morning, I will admit. But nonetheless, I felt convicted and I felt God tugging at my heart to sit and be quiet. So, I found a book in our house (one of the hundreds my husband brought with him) and this book is entitled “Waiting- Finding hope when God seems silent’”. It's been sitting on my coffee table for about 3 weeks now and I just now decided to crack it open. The title brought some curiosity to mind because this was something that I have been struggling with the past few months. And most Christians can relate when I say that nothing is harder than when your prayers seems to bounce off the ceiling and come right back to you. The times when you need help the most and God seems to be silent. I once wondered if God was on a coffee break at Starbucks, sitting and reading people magazine and forgot that I desperately needed his comfort and guidance. Of course, after some time, I realized that wasn’t true; I knew it wasn’t true. But today, while reading this book, I did realize how hard it is to wait. I once heard a statistic that we spend about 2 years waiting. If you take all the time we wait in line in the drive thru, wait at the doctors office, wait for our morning latte at Starbucks, it adds up to about two years - more for others. Waiting....it's what our American society does more than anything and might I say we are terrible at it. We live in a world where everything is at the tip of our fingertips. We want it and we want it now. That’s how we live our life. How many times do you catch yourself say “I can’t wait for.....” - you fill in the blank. We are the most impatient society in the world. Of course, with the advancements in technology we find that waiting is something of the past. But in those times when you are forced to wait, the times when you can’t do anything about it, how do you react? When you are late for work, and you come to a railroad crossing and just as you are about to cross, the signal starts to flash, the barriers come down and of course a ten minute freight train has just made you that much later, that much more anxious, that much more frustrated because YOU have to wait. How dare that train! Doesn’t it know that YOU have things to do? Doesn’t it know that your time is precious and you can’t be waiting on some else’s time? How often has that happened? How often do you get so angry because YOUR time is being wasted?

Waiting...we all do it...have come to hate it, despise it and go to desperate lengths to avoid it. The anxiety becomes that much more difficult when you are waiting on life....”Waiting in a dead-end career break, waiting in a in unhappy marriage for relief or escape, waiting in a chronic illness for a ray of hope, waiting in solitude for the loneliness to subside, waiting in turmoil for peace to come”... “Sometimes we find our lives placed on hold. Deep questions begin to surface. How long must I wait? Is there any meaning to all this waiting? Can I trust God? We can’t help but wonder what is happening- and why?’”

This is where I am right now. Questioning where God is. Why hasn’t my life been made perfect? Why hasn’t my husband found a job? Why do I still get up a 3:30 in the morning to go to work? God, why haven’t you done anything yet? Why am I still waiting? I thought that waiting was over for me. I had been waiting for months... Waiting to get married, waiting to move out of my parents house, waiting to be intimate until my wedding night, waiting to start a new job, waiting for a new chapter in my life to start. I did my share of waiting, God, and I don’t want to do it any more. That’s where I am at. My new chapter has started but only the first paragraph of it. I, now, I find myself waiting again. Waiting for Chris to find a full time job, waiting to move... again, waiting for the point where I don’t have to work anymore, waiting for God to make a move. And that can be more difficult than waiting for any freight train. Waiting on the God of the Universe to say “Go”. In reading just the first few pages today, I learned that life is not all about what I want and when I get to have it. Amazing, I know! Yes, I have always known this... but when I put God into the mix, it makes a lot more sense to me. God taught me this morning that waiting is hard, yes, but it's in the process of waiting where he does all of his work in us. To quote the book “That at least as important as the things we wait for is the work God wants to do in us while we wait.” “Waiting is not just the thing we have to do until we get what we hope for. Waiting is part of the process of becoming what we hope for”.

God is the master at doing “behind the scenes work”. He is preparing you, growing you, making sure things are perfect before He blesses you. It reminds me of all time I spent working in theatre. You don’t have opening night of a play without first preparing a script, making the costumes, building the set, putting on makeup. If I said that tomorrow, I want to put on a production of “Romeo and Juliet” on Broadway with me as the director, the cast, the set constructor and musicians and have it become a hit overnight, you would think I was nuts. Things take time. It takes preparation. Life isn’t like a microwave dinner.... To quote Tom Hanks “It’s like a box of chocolates.” So, in this time of waiting, which by no doubt sucks, and I still have the mentality that I want things done on my time, when and where I want it, God is teaching me to be content. CONTENT!!!!! Yep, something else Americans know nothing about. Contentment. We have always been told.... "go after what you want, don’t let anything get in your way! Strive for the best and don’t stop until you get it!” Ever said that to someone? Ever thought that? Now let me say, this can apply in some situations, but we have taken this attitude and applied it to EVERYTHING! We don’t know how to be content. Patterson says “God is doing a good work in us as we wait, producing in us things like patience, perseverance, character and hope.” The apostle Paul writes in the book of Timothy: “After all, we brought nothing with us when we came into the world, and we can’t take anything with us when we leave it. So if we have enough food and clothing, let us be content. But people who long to be rich fall into temptation and are trapped by many foolish and harmful desires that plunge them into ruin and destruction. For the love of money is the root of all kinds of evil. And some people, craving money, have wandered from the true faith and pierced themselves with many sorrows.” We have all been there. Patterson says, “Whatever we have, we have because God in His grace and generosity has given it to us. When we realize this, there comes into our lives a joyful gratitude for what we do have and we are freed from resentment and anxiety over what we do not have.” Are you content? Or are you living with the want to always have more? Are you constantly thanking God for what you do have? Or are you always asking God for more and getting mad when he doesn’t deliver right away? Paul tells the Philippians “Not that I was ever in need, for I have learned how to be content with whatever I have. I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little. For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength.” Does Christ give you the strength to get through? Or are you relying on your own strength and wisdom? Have you thanked God today? Not just for your house, your car, your paycheck...but for your life...for being alive? For being able to take that breath you just took...and that breath......and that one. It's easy to give thanks when things are going well. But do you give thanks when things aren’t? Are you complaining and asking, "why, God, why?"

Can I challenge you? Give thanks, not just when everything goes well, but when you are in tears because things are not going the way YOU planned. Did you ever think that God has different plans than you do? “With God’s power working in us, He can do much, much more than we can ask or imagine.’’ Maybe God is waiting for you to give up control of your life. He wants to take control, because he loves you so passionately, so deeply, so much more than any human being could, and he wants what is best for you. You just need to LET GO AND LET GOD....as I once saw on a bumper sticker. He wants you to have good things, but not always when YOU want. Give it up, all of it...because he knows better than we do. Ecclesiastes 7 :14 says “When life is good, enjoy it. But when life is hard, remember: God gives good times and hard times, and no one knows what tomorrow will bring.” Later in 8:16, it says “I tried to understand all that happens on earth. I saw how busy people are, working day and night and hardly ever sleeping. I also saw all that God has done. Nobody can understand what God does here on earth. No matter how hard people try to understand it, they cannot. Even if wise people say they understand, they cannot, no one can really understand.” So you see, God knows that you don’t understand... He wrote it in the Bible. He wants you trust Him. He created the Earth, he knows it better than you. He created you, and he probably knows you better than you know yourself. Trust in that. Trust in Him. You may not understand why things are the way that they are, but stay hopeful, praise Him no matter what circumstance, and TRUST HIM. Jesus said “Trust in God, trust also in Me.” Paul said “Do not worry about anything, but pray and ask God for everything you need, always giving thanks. And God’s peace which is so great we cannot understand it, will keep your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.” People, keep your eyes towards Christ, your hearts abounding in love, and your minds at rest. There is NOTHING our God cannot do. Be patient, be kind, don’t be jealous and don’t brag. Don’t be rude, don’t be selfish, and don’t get upset with others. Don’t count up wrongs that have been done. Patiently accept ALL things. Always trust, always hope. “These tree things continue forever: Faith, Hope and Love. And the greatest of these is LOVE.’’

If you know someone who needs to hear this, please feel free to forward it.

Love, Peace, and Blessings,

Ashley

Random Treasures

2008-04-23T19:57:00.003-05:00

“Yet even now”, declares the LORD, “Return to Me with all your heart, with fasting, with weeping, and with mourning; and rend your hearts not your garments.” Return to the LORD your God, for He is gracious and merciful, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love ; and he relents over disaster.–Joel 2:12,13

Afterward the Children of Israel will shall return and seek the LORD their God, and David their king, and they shall come in fear to the LORD and to His goodness in the latter days–Hosea 3:5

Though the fig tree should not blossom, nor fruit be on the vines, the produce of the olive fail and the fields yield no food, the flock be cut off from the fold and there be no herd in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the LORD; I will take joy in the God of my salvation. God the Lord, is my strength; he makes my feet like the deer’s; he makes me tread on my high places–Habakkuk 3:17-19

The Cry of Our Hearts - Part 9

2008-04-17T07:00:00.003-05:00

The Lord will fulfill His purpose for me; Your love, O Lord, endures forever." - Psalm 138:8

No matter where I go in life, Your Spirit will guide me.
Every time I find You somewhere in my life.
Always seeking, never finding, never knowing
what I'm hiding.
Your Spirit fills me in places no one else can find.
For my heart is deep with dark places - fill me!

Your Spirit guides me to places I can't see.
Have Your Spirit come back to me.
Feed our stomachs with tacos and our hearts with love.

Take me to that place, where hopes and dreams
bring us closer to You and in the end,
Your purpose will be known.

- Team Taranatron

for the beginning of this series, you can go here
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4 , Part 5, Part 6 , Part 7 , Part 8

The Cry of Our Hearts - Part 8

2008-04-16T14:25:00.000-05:00

Hear my prayer, O Lord; let my cry for help come to You. - Psalm 102:1

Here is my heart, broken and cut.
No other could mend, so I brought it to You.
Lord, hear my prayer,
though it's as silent as the night.
Take me by heart, take me by hand.
Walk with me so I'm not alone.
Mend my poor heart, that I may live.
This is my prayer.

Wake me up from my spiritual sleep,
yet give me rest in Your Name.
Please hear my prayer for this new job.

When I can't see, You still see
the big picture; You push aside everything
to spend time with me.
I'm tired and overwhelmed... there's just
so much to do. But I know that Your power
is much greater than my circumstance.
Lord, melt me and shape me into the tool
that You would have me to be.
Reopen my heart; light a flame of passion inside
that only satisfies and delights in You.

I don't know what to do;
I don't know what to say;
and I don't know how to wait patiently.
Teach me to trust You,
and to truly know Your voice.
You redeem all of my mistakes
and make them beautiful
when I entrust them to You.

for the beginning of this series, you can go here
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4 , Part 5, Part 6 , Part 7

The Cry of Our Hearts - Part 7

2008-04-15T09:00:00.001-05:00

(in times of failure)

May the intensity of my longing for You be pleasing
even when we feel we don't deserve it.
The Lord sees and judges the heart, is pleased
with a heart of obedience.
When I'm feeling so low, God is even then with me.
Hold my eyes up to Your light.
Please hear my prayer for this new job.
May I remember that I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
What others see as nothing You find in me something great.
even when it wasn't perfect.

- The 3 Musketeers

for the beginning of this series, you can go here
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4 , Part 5, Part 6

The Cry of Our Hearts - Part 6

2008-04-14T07:00:00.002-05:00

I woke up today feeling that life was gray.
You are faithful despite my unfaithfulness, doubt, and confusion.
In my head, I know You are here. Sometimes my heart is not as sure -
sorry for my instability...

Your love is amazing, constant, never-changing and beautiful.
Thank You!
God of light, I want to see You through my heavy eye-lids.
Thank You for making that possible.
Even when I'm a moron, You still prove faithful!
(How do You do that?)
Let Your overflowing love pour over to others more deeply.

God, give me strength that I don't have.
Help me keep my focus on You.
Pray for me, Lord.

- God's Grace

for the beginning of this series, you can go here
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4 , Part 5

The Cry of Our Hearts - Part 5

2008-04-13T12:00:00.002-05:00

My heart cries out for wisdom.
I seek You and still find no joy.
Where is the path You want me to take?
Thanks for the "treasures" You have brought this week.

My body cries out for Your strength
for I am weak without Your mighty power.
Words can't describe how I feel towards You.
Your grace is enough!

Lord, if You could just speak a little louder, please...
God, I need You. I cry out for Your touch, Your love,
Your wings to come and keep me from harm.

Like a chicken with its head cut off, I run around
seeking satisfaction and fulfillment. I need You
to grab my face and show me the satisfaction I may find in You.

Why do I even bother breathing
if I don't breathe in You?
Life is death if You're not living in me.

Ps. 70:4 - "May all who seek You rejoice and be glad in You."

- The T-Birds

for the beginning of this series, you can go here
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4

The Cry of Our Hearts - Part 4

2008-04-12T09:30:00.001-05:00

"O Lord, You have searched me, and You know me." - Psalm 139:1

You Rocketh.

I can't hide from You, even when I try.
Take the anxieties from every corner of my heart
and hold me to You
so that I cannot avoid my responsibilities.

Ask me. Tell me.
I am here for You.

Lord, set my soul on fire; You are my one desire.
Let my tears fall in Your hands; let my trust be kept in You.

- B to the K2G2

for the beginning of this series, you can go here
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3

The Cry of Our Hearts - Part 3

2008-04-11T07:00:00.005-05:00

By seeking Him wholeheartedly, we shall find peace.
How almighty is our God; how awesome His power is.
By trusting in Him, we can live this life for Him
without limitations.

Thank You, God, for my great friends
and thanks for always being there for me.
I don't really know where I'm supposed to belong.
Thank You for loving me no matter how many times I mess up.

Your grace is sufficient for me.
Your love is everlasting.
You are holy.
I give You praise, for You are good.

- The Shout Outs

for this series intro, you can go here.
Part 1, Part 2

The Cry of Our Hearts - Part 2

2008-04-10T06:53:00.002-05:00

Turn my frown upside-down.
Please heal my wounds and end my suffering.
Lord, in You I find my rest.

Help! I need somebody, not just anybody...
to quiet my eager heart and to put a skip in my step.
Sticks and stones may break my bones, but Jesus
will always heal them.

Keep me safe, guide me home
and fill me with Your love.
Fill me with Your love and peace,
a kind which I have rarely known.

- The Freedom Writers

Series Intro
Part 1

The Cry of Our Hearts - Part 1

2008-04-09T14:23:00.003-05:00

Ok, Lord, seven of us lookin' up at You.
are we ready for Your return?
I want to shout but my voice is muffled by the branches.
Autumn trees blossom green.
Find rest, o my soul, find rest in God alone.

How long do we wait to listen for Your voice?
Even though You are here with us every day,
why do I always feel alone?
How long until we realize that You are the One True God?
Reliance on God relieves anxiety.
I need You, Jesus.

The beauty that You have created is amazing, thank You!
You are truly amazing.
You know the number of stars and the hairs on my head.
You are amazing.
So I shout up to the heavens, "I need Your help!
I need a rescuer."

- By The Doors

For the beginning of this series, you can go here.
For the next post in this series, go here.

The Cry of Our Hearts - Introduction

2008-04-09T14:15:00.001-05:00

This past week at Torch, we did something a little... well, I guess you could cliche-icly call it "out of the box." (wow, it's kind of ironic that the phrase "out of the box" could be called cliche...) :)

We brought our worship to the Lord without music. I have to say, I was a little worried about how that would go. As our friendly neighborhood worship director, I know that it's important to make sure we know the reality that music and singing are NOT the only form of worship we can bring to the Lord, and that it's good for us to experience that corporately from time to time - but I was still a little nervous.

Silly me.

You guys took a risk and brought your hearts to the Lord in a really honest way, and I know it blessed His heart - and, in that crazy cool way that worship often works, we got blessed in the process of offering our worship to Him.

Nights like that are worth a standing stone, even if it's only a virtual one. :) So here's ours: a series of posts on Chasing Jesus, offering the cry of our hearts to His. Every line of these psalms, with the exception of anything straight from God's Word, was written by one of you. Let's continue to pray them together, amen?

for the next post in this series, you can go here

Confessions of a Modern Day Pharisee

2008-04-01T11:28:00.005-05:00

Deuteronomy 4:32-40

Ask now about the former days, long before your time, from the day God created man on the earth; ask from one end of the heavens to the other. Has anything so great as this ever happened, or has anything like it ever been heard of? Has any other people heard the voice of God speaking out of fire, as you have, and lived? Has any god ever tried to take for himself one nation out of another nation, by testings, by miraculous signs and wonders, by war, by a mighty hand and an outstretched arm, or by great and awesome deeds, like all the things the LORD your God did for you in Egypt before your very eyes?

You were shown these things so that you might know that the LORD is God; besides him there is no other. From heaven he made you hear his voice to discipline you. On earth he showed you his great fire, and you heard his words from out of the fire. Because he loved your forefathers and chose their descendants after them, he brought you out of Egypt by his Presence and his great strength, to drive out before you nations greater and stronger than you and to bring you into their land to give it to you for your inheritance, as it is today.

Acknowledge and take to heart this day that the LORD is God in heaven above and on the earth below. There is no other. Keep his decrees and commands, which I am giving you today, so that it may go well with you and your children after you and that you may live long in the land the LORD your God gives you for all time.

I wanted to confess that I often forget this.

After the Fact

2008-03-27T18:34:00.001-05:00

Easter isn't something I used to ever give much thought to. Growing up it always meant candy, dyeing eggs and usually a dinner with some sort of ham meal with extended family. Since I rededicated my life to Christ a couple years ago, the cross and resurrection mean Easter to me.

From Mark 8:31

"He then began to teach them that the son of man must suffer many things and be rejected by elders, chief priests and teachers of the law, and that he must be killed, and after three days rise again."

There's a song that helped change my whole perspective and thought process towards the cross and what was happening there called The Fatal Wound, by Switchfoot. I hate referencing songs for anything but the message in this song is very challenging. Read the lyrics:

I am the crisis, I am the bitter end
I'm gonna gun this down
I am divided, I am the razor's edge
There is no easing out

Son of sorrow, staring down forever
With an aching view
Disenchanted, let's go down together
with the fatal wound

This is the real thing, no rubber bullets now
This is the final bow
My breath avoids me, my chest is in my hands
My stomach's upside down, down.

Son of sorrow, staring down forever
With an aching view
Disenchanted, let's go down together
with the fatal wound.

a>

Now read Psalm 22:1, 11-19 and pick-up the prophecy being spoken in David's words.

My God, my God, why have you forsaken me? Do not be far from me for trouble is near and there is no one to help. I am poured out like water and all my bones are out of joint. Hy heart has turned to wax; it has melted away within me. My strength is dried up like a potsherd, and my tongue sticks to the roof of my mouth; you lay me in the dust of death. Dogs have surrounded me; a band of evil men has encircled me, they have pierced my hands and feet. I can count all my bones; people stare and gloat over me. They divide my garments among them and cast lots for my clothing. But you, O Lord, be not far off; O my strength, come quickly to help me.

When Jesus was dying on the cross he asked those same words, "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me." I often wonder if Jesus was remembering the cries of David from the Psalms whenever I read that passage. Reading these words puts the death of Christ into a greater picture, a more real picture for me. This was more than some old story we rehash once a year or if we go to church consistently hear over and over again. This was real. This happened so that you and I could experience freedom from sin and it's eternal consequences.

I know that Easter is gone and a couple of days old at this point, but it still doesn't change the fact that Christ suffered for more than a holiday, for more than a once a year celebration. He suffered for every moment of our lives here on Earth. For that, we owe him every moment, and I want my life to be wrapped around that.

Relationships

2008-02-18T11:30:00.003-06:00

I heard a two-part podcast today that I think could be incredibly helpful to any number of us - check it out here and here. It's by Alistair Begg, one of my favorite teachers, and part of a series he's been doing on marriage and relationships. It'll take about an hour to hear the whole thing - but it'll be worth it.

Enjoy. :)

Valentine's day

2008-02-14T09:42:00.003-06:00

Last year something was read before we worshiped through song on Valentines Day. I'd like to reproduce that here since it is Valentine's Day yet again. Here it is:

Today, as you all know, is Valentines day. Whether you like it or not, enjoy the holiday, hate the holiday or are indifferent to the holiday, you have thought about romance this week. It has been everywhere, on billboards, in ads on television, radio and the newspaper, and people are talking about it. For each of us, our hearts are in different places. Some have recently been broken, and this holiday is reminding us of what could have been and is met with tears. Others' hearts are cold, possibly jaded from some previous hurt. For some, our hearts may have just received that spark, kindling feelings that were not there before or bringing feelings that had been smoldering to life. For some of us, our hearts are burning brightly with a passion for another which is returned. And still some of us may be feeling unrequited love, our hearts going out to someone who doesn't even know we exist. For many of us, our hearts have been in different places as the years have gone by on valentines day. Life is fluid -- the days go by and our passions change. What might be so important to us today may mean nothing to us tomorrow. Yet there is one thing that has never changed since the beginning of time, and that's God love for us. He gave each of us the ultimate Valentine's Day gift when He sent His only son to die on our behalf. On your behalf. He knew you before you were knitted in your mother's womb, and because He wanted to spend eternity with you, He sent His one and only son to die on the cross. All He asks is that we return that love.

So in just a minute we're going to be worshiping Him through song. Tonight, let's bring Him more than a song. Love makes us all into fools. Who here hasn't done something in the name of love that, looking back, was extremely foolish in the eyes of the world? Yet, we didn't care, we had eyes only for that individual we were being a fool for. As David said, after having marched back into Jerusalem before the Ark of God, after having stripped his robe and danced as a fool for those watching, but with a glorious love for God, " I will become even more undignified than this, and I will be humiliated in my own eyes." So tonight, as we serenade God, remember those words of David, and remember that, no matter where our hearts are tonight, God's love for us burns bright. Don't let His love be unrequited. Give yourself over to Him. Have eyes only for Him. Love makes us fools, and we don't care. Tonight, as you sing and dance, have eyes only for the one you love, who loved you first, before you were ever born. Let these songs, no, let your heart be your valentine to God tonight.

The Good Shepherd

2008-02-11T15:44:00.001-06:00

"Never again will they hunger; never again will they thirst. The sun will not beat upon them, nor any scorching heat. For the Lamb at the center of the throne will be their shepherd; he will lead them to springs of living water. And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes."

Revelation 7:16-17

(the Lamb at the center of the throne)

"The I saw a Lamb, looking as if it had been slain, standing in the center of the throne, encircled by the four living creatures and the elders."

Revelation 5:6a

I'm reading through Revelation right now (if you weren't picking that up) and it's rocking my world!

To be honest those "springs of living water" are sounding very nice right now. Erica (wife) and I are now both jobless. I lost my job in July and in response to God's consistent prodings Erica quit her job two weeks ago tommorow. Unfortunately, or at least uncomfortably for us, the prodings came in as a "don't stay here anymore" rather than a "go specifically to this place." Neither of us have any real leads on where to go next for work. And honestly the prospect of paying all the same bills with no income starts to feel a little overwhelming. The "sun" and "scorching heat" feel to be "beating upon" us in this season.

Honestly even the "hunger" and "thirst" from this passage speak to my heart too. He's teaching me to be hungry, to need Him. I see moments where I'm really hungering after Him and seeking Him but then, between those moments, I get distracted by every other thing I can fill my stomach with, spoiling my appetite. I want to want more of Jesus, I know I need more of Him. So I've been asking for a hunger for Him in my life. And He's been turning that up!

So, this passage from Revelation really spoke to me. The promise that our shepherd will lead us into a place where we don't hunger or thirst for anything, we'll have all of Him to fill all of our needs! And where the sun and the things of this life will pass away and not beat down on us anymore.
I'm also celebrating the blessing that it is to share in His suffering for now. I found it really interesting that "the Lamb at the center of the throne will be their shepherd." The dependency we're commanded to have on Christ as we lean on Him in our suffering is the dependency He had as He leaned on the Father's grace in His suffering. And through depending on Him in our suffering, we get to know His heart and His voice more closely. "I am the good shepherd; I know my sheep and my sheep know me- just as the Father knows me and I know the Father- and I lay down my life for the sheep." John 10:14-15
~also~
"When he has brought out all his own, he goes ahead of them, and his sheep follow him because they know his voice. But they will never follow a stranger; in fact, they will run away from him because they do now recognize a stranger's voice." John 10:4-5

So, we still don't have any answers or leads for jobs, but we'll keep seeking God's voice in the trial.

Worship and Water

2008-01-31T10:02:00.000-06:00

I love the musical worship we have at Torch. If you have ever been there, you have likely witnessed me in the back with my bass going positively nuts. But God has laid on my heart a challenge to the way that we approach worship.

Worship ≠ Music

Two things happen during musical worship; there is an emotional reaction to the music and a physical/audible expression of that emotional reaction. This is only an appropriate response when first a spiritual and cognitive surrender to God is present. It is possible to have an emotional reaction without this but this isn’t worship. You might feel really good in the middle of it, but without surrender, if I can be so bold, this is the opposite of worship; comparable to the Pharisees praying obnoxiously on the streets so that people would notice them.

Worship = The act and attitude of wholeheartedly giving oneself to God.

Let that sink in a little bit. This means that anytime you are in a place, situation, or atmosphere that facilitates worship with God and you are not giving yourself to Him, then you’re not worshiping. It doesn’t matter how many times you sing along to a “worship set” sit through a sermon or sign a tithe check because none of that is worship until you’ve given your heart to God.

In Psalm 51 David points out that burnt offerings and sacrifices aren’t what God is looking but rather a broken and contrite heart.

This definition of worship also means that anytime you give yourself to God, you’re worshiping no matter your location, circumstance or environment. And this is what we are being challenged to do.

In John chapter 4 Jesus talks about being thirsty for God, with a heart that worships in spirit and in truth. Church (Torch) should never ever be the only time that you consider yourself worshiping.

Worship is like water. You need to worship the same way you need to drink water.

Let me explain. God doesn’t have some psychological complex of needing to be patted on the back. It doesn’t lower His self-esteem when you don’t worship Him. You don’t have anything to offer God that he doesn’t already have. He doesn’t “NEED” you to worship Him.

He wants you to have a heart condition of a need to worship Him. You’re the one who needs to need to worship Him. Without a thirst for Him, without a hunger for His presence, you’re going to spiritually die.

Dehydration1 is the greatest enemy to any athlete. I don’t consider myself an athlete by any standard, but it’s a good analogy so go with me on it. 50-60% of your body weight is water. Think about that, divide your weight by half and that is how much of you is made of water. Without water you wouldn’t be alive. You know you can go several days without food but only a few without water.

Dehydration1 becomes fatal after only 15% of water loss and you start to feel the effects of it after only 2%. At that point athletes have a 30% decrease in performance. That severe of a detriment looses races, I’m not talking second or third place either. I mean looses.

God prepared me for this message by pointing out a two day period when I hadn’t had any water. I seriously sat down and could not remember a single drink in something like a 48 hour period. That was stupid. I contracted a serious migraine and drinking water right away didn’t help.

In the same way when you aren’t worshiping God, even the slightest bit your spiritual health takes a major hit. Keep in mind our definition of worship.

Worship = The act and attitude of wholeheartedly giving oneself to God.

So whenever you are not wholeheartedly giving yourself to God, your spiritual health is in trouble.

All of that to say: when are you not living for God? At what point in your week are you more concerned with what’s going on or how you feel than about giving your life to God? Because it’s those things that are gonna kill you. Little by little you are spiritually dehydrating yourself.

When my little sister was four, she had a serious infection in her bladder. She was on medication and underwent lots of treatment but the doctor's primary prescription was “Drink Water”. She hated it! My mother in her loving way tried everything. Ice cold/ or luke warm/ with a straw; she even bought tons of flavored water. But my sister fought it the whole time. Such a simple thing was her cure and she fought it so hard she could have died. This particular infection was prone to spread to the blood stream and had it remained in her system for much longer the issue would have been much more severe. Now, she has been recovered for several years but still to this day has a hard time just enjoying a glass of water.

Sometimes we treat worship the same way. But you need to worship God. If your life isn’t about God then it’s not worth living.

Wherever you are in class/at work/at home, God wants you to be taking little sips all day long. Have the attitude and follow through the act of giving your every moment to God.

Isaiah 55:1-3
Psalm 42:1-2

In Christ,
Mickey

This Is Our God

2008-01-22T14:55:00.000-06:00

On and off for the past couple of weeks, I've had that old Chris Tomlin song floating around in my head, This Is Our God. One of the things I really like about that song is that it falls under the category of songs that Paul describes this way in Ephesians 5:19-20:

Speak to one another with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs. Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.

or this way in Colossians 3:16:

Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God.

People have been singing songs since - well, forever, probably. While musical styles vary from culture to culture, there's not a music-less people anywhere in the world. Creation itself is singing God's praise, and we (as a part of God's creation) can't help it either. Oh, sure, we use music for other forms of expression as well, but it's always been a part of church culture since the church began.

Why is that? I think there's a lot of reasons, but I think one reason is that a melody can help you remember things better than you can without it. Musical intelligence, they call it. :) (I like that, but I'm biased.) :) So singing a song about God on a Sunday (or a Monday!) can help you remember the truth about who God is as the melody runs through your head later in the week. Knowing the same songs as people around you helps you remember that truth in community. That's a big piece of it, too, I think. And in some ways, songs can also help us remember other things by association - I mean, think about it - "that song" comes on the radio, and how quickly do we drift down memory lane?

Last night as I thought about the healing that God has done in my own life, and how much of it, in some ways, there still is to do - I remembered the words of a song that spoke great truth into my life at a time when I really needed to hear it. The song is called "Before You Call" and you can find the lyrics here. The words come from Isaiah 40:11 and 65:24:

He tends his flock like a shepherd: He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart; he gently leads those that have young.

Before they call I will answer; while they are still speaking I will hear.

While they are still speaking.... I love that. Even before we cry out to God, He is already listening, and He hears all of it, even before we're done explaining... We worship a God who knows us. This is no small thing.

Worship. Declaring the "worth-ship" of God. Getting our eyes off ourselves and remembering who God is, both in and of Himself, and in our lives. That's what I love most about that Chris Tomlin song... it reminds me of who God is to me, to our community, to the world - it reminds me of how big a God I serve, and how worthy He is of my love and adoration. And it reminds me to go to Him, because He is who He says He is:

a refuge for the poor and a shelter from the storm - Isaiah 25:4
a father to the orphan and a healer to the broken - Psalm 68:5, Malachi 4:2
a fountain for the thirsty and a lover for the lonely - Zechariah 13:1, Isaiah 55:1, Psalm 68:6, John 3:16

and He is oh, so much more...

I was reading a couple of weeks ago in Isaiah, and these words jumped out at me:

Was my arm too short to ransom you? Do I lack the strength to rescue you? - Isaiah 50:2

The answer to that, of course, is no. He is God. Of course He can ransom us and rescue us. In fact, He has, is, and will. So let us trust in the name of the Lord, and rely on our God (Isaiah 50:10) - for as we sang together last night: He is more than enough.

i live this for

2008-01-17T23:48:00.001-06:00

i am a thief and a liar. i have taken what was not given to me and claimed it as mine. i live this for self. i act as though all i know is striving for self gain. i follow what leads to nothing and ignore the effect of what is ahead. i find myself clinging to everything for momentary reprieve. when endless relief is right in front of me. the warmness of a light on a cold night directly in front of me, i merely glance at. tonight i have found the cold emptyness because i have lived this for self.

the lies my words make match the ones i hear and believe. these things that fulfill temporarily without fully filling. i neglect what is shattering the silence saying to me, "help is here, follow and believe." yet i still turn to what is empty and leading me to nothing. i walk the road with an end when an endless way is in front of me. i find only what i wish to find. i envision only what i hope to see. when the reality of what could be is much greater. i forget the unending hope that's always abided. the love chasing me that has always befriended me, seeking me. for this love only can provide. this love only satisfies.

from the mouth of this love come words of truth. my path finds light with this love only. my heart finds pleasure with this love only. my soul finds rest with this love only. my life finds purpose with this love only. no longer will i live this for self. no longer will i follow what is momentary. for this life is fleeting in itself. now my heart will seek the love and my soul will yearn for the truth, that only this love brings. no longer i live this for self, rather this love.

Merry Christmas!

2007-12-24T16:27:00.000-06:00

"And it came to pass in those days that a decree went out from Caesar Augustus that all the world should be registered. This census first took place while Quirinius was governing Syria. So all went to be registered, everyone to his own city. Joseph also went up from Galilee, out of the city of Nazareth, into Judea, to the city of David, which is called Bethlehem, because he was of the house and lineage of David, to be registered with Mary, his betrothed wife, who was with child. So it was, that while they were there, the days were completed for her to be delivered. And she brought forth her firstborn Son, and wrapped Him in swaddling cloths, and laid Him in a manger, because there was no room for them in the inn.

Now there were in the same country shepherds living out in the fields, keeping watch over their flock by night. And behold, an angel of the Lord stood before them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were greatly afraid. Then the angel said to them, “Do not be afraid, for behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy which will be to all people. For there is born to you this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord. And this will be the sign to you: You will find a Babe wrapped in swaddling cloths, lying in a manger.” And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God and saying: “Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, goodwill toward men!”

So it was, when the angels had gone away from them into heaven, that the shepherds said to one another, “Let us now go to Bethlehem and see this thing that has come to pass, which the Lord has made known to us.” And they came with haste and found Mary and Joseph, and the Babe lying in a manger. Now when they had seen Him, they made widely known the saying which was told them concerning this Child. And all those who heard it marveled at those things which were told them by the shepherds. But Mary kept all these things and pondered them in her heart. Then the shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things that they had heard and seen, as it was told them." - Luke 2: 1-20

Praying for you: the peace of Christ, today and always.

Merry Christmas!

God is Faithful

2007-12-19T20:40:00.000-06:00

But now, this is what the LORD says - He who created you, O Jacob, He who formed you, O Israel: "Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name; you are Mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze. For I am the LORD, your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Saviour..." Isaiah 43:1-3a

Don't be afraid. I've heard more than once, tho I've yet to count them myself, that 365 times in the Bible it is written: "Do not be afraid" or "Fear not." Coincidence? I don't think so. :) Daily, a reminder to not be afraid...

What are you afraid of? Do you need to be afraid? Or is there something you can do with that fear besides holding onto it and letting it rule over you?

I find it slightly discomfiting that those verses don't say "if you pass through waters or rivers" or "if you walk through the fire..." They say "when." Trials come. It happens. But if we know Jesus, we know the One who promised they wouldn't ultimately overwhelm us. He took an entire nation through a sea on dry ground. He kept three men alive in a furnace. And He will walk with you today. "Draw near to God and He will draw near to you." (James 4:8) Don't be afraid. He is faithful.

desperate

2007-12-02T09:45:00.000-06:00

when was the last time you were desperate for something? you wanted it so bad and almost felt that if you didn't have this something you couldn't survive without it. sometimes for us that can be a person, a material item, food, money, etc. sometimes we miss someone and believe our life won't be the same without them. occassionally we want an item and feel our life is missing something and would be so much better if we had it. or maybe you feel that if you had more money you'd be much better off. when was the last time you were that desperate for God?

have you ever been so desperate for God that your seeking to find him in every moment and crying out to him to be near you. not just the, "yeah God, your in my heart" kind of way, but more of, "God I NEED to feel you with me today" kind of way. the key word is need. that's real desperation. i've had seasons of life, and i'm sure you have to, where you needed God. your whole day was spent seeking him in everything, clinging to him because of circumstances in your life that were beating you down. in every moment you wanted to find him anywhere you could. what an awesome place to be.

but why can't we be that way all the time? why is it that in the good times of our lives, when everything's going smooth and we're loving everything about our situation that we turn to him less? or maybe, when those moments of good pass into dark times in our life we turn away from God. we shut him off and blame him angrily for what's going on in our life. honestly, this has been me lately. i've tried to shut God out of my life due to hard times, thinking immaturely how could the God who created everything let these things happen? i've given so much to him yet he lets things like this happen? truth is he didn't and i know it. this world is full of evil and fallen. we're the culprits of sin not God and the fallout of sin often results in dark times. whether or not our sin directly caused our circumstances doesn't matter when we're all sinners and the cause of this awful mess of a world.

the amazing thing is that for me, through all of the darkness in my life lately, i've felt him or seen him or heard him trying to get my attention. he's trying to open up the doors to my heart and reveal to me his love but i slam them shut. how undeserving of him i am but yet he doesn't give up on me. he's never given up on any of us from the beginning of time. he never gave up on the israelites, he sent his son Jesus to die for us because he wasn't going to give up on us. and even now, when our world is beating us down, he won't give up on us because he loves us. the proof is there, we just have to remember it when we're going through the valley.

in concluding, the last couple of weeks have been some of the lowest and highest times of my life, pure hell, surrounded by uncertainty, heartbreak, and loss. moments of newness, where i had no idea what to do but to pray and depend on him. but when they were over the bitterness crept in. i hate that i've tried to shut him off, i hate that i've hurt him when he's been the only friend there for me, the only one who's love can satisfy. he is the one i want to be desperate for because he has never let me down, and never will. his love is better than life, and i always want to be desperate for that.

The Remedy

2007-11-10T13:14:00.000-06:00

A couple of months ago I began reading through the Old Testament, well let's just say from Numbers to where I currently am in Nehemiah (there's some good stuff before Numbers I would agree, if you're willing to sift through to find it). So anyways, the running theme throughout the Old Testament is the Israelites' rebellion and straying from God. The Israelites spent so much time running from God, even though he showed himself to them so many times and delivered them from so many enemies, they ran.

This caused me to started thinking about my own current situation. I know God is calling me to be attentive to a certain situation and to follow him through it. However, I've spent the last few days running from that. Telling him time and again that I'm done and want out. It didn't hit me until during quiet time today, I was reading through II Chronicles about the Israelites' idol worship and how God in his grace over and again gave them a chance at redemption, but one line in the passage struck me. "But God knew there was no remedy." (speaking of their lost state of sin) I could see the parallels in my life up until that point.

However, I/we have a remedy in Jesus. He rescued me from a lost state of sin and is giving me a world of love and happiness, if I just trust him and surrender everything to him. I've spent the last couple of months reading through the Old Testament and have been tremendously blessed by the revelations God has there for us. How alive it is, and how amazing He is, but this one fact never was bigger until now. I want to learn from the mistakes of the Israelites and hear God in my own failures and rebellions calling me back to him. I want to hear his voice in the midst of uncertainty saying "I am here." So many times I've thought, "If only God would tell me what to do right now, it would be simpler." That's true, but I'm also realizing it's simpler than that. He is there often saying, "Abide in me," or "Be patient." He's not a complicated God. The lesson with my current situation I'm dealing with is this, and it's simple: He is here; wait on him. Don't become scared and run. He's here and will lead. Just be patient.

Quick Update from Germany

2007-11-07T14:12:00.000-06:00

Well, rehearsal day is over, and we're heading home for the night. 7:00am tomorrow we start a last minute run-thru of the first two sessions, and at 9:00am the conference begins. Many, many things to do yet! We have yet to see powerpoint up on the screens for any significant length of time. That's a little nerve-wracking. There are small things here and there that haven't come together, and I saw some of the guys repainting a door backstage a couple minutes ago. We could definitely use some prayer tonight and tomorrow - but we know God will come through as He always does, and it will be an incredible day.

Can't wait to tell you all about it!

Hannah's Prayer

2007-11-06T02:42:00.000-06:00

Her name is Hannah. She's an older woman, tall, laugh lines, grey hair, visibly someone who has weathered much but done it with that deep joy that marks those who follow Him. Wrapped in her dark dress coat and a brightly colored scarf, she follows us into the arena where our tech crew will soon begin the long haul of a million things that need to be done in the next three days, setting up for the conference that will begin here on Thursday.

"We pray for this," she says. "Years ago when first they begin building this place, we stand here, and we pray. We ask God that someday the Christians will come and worship in this arena. Last year for the first time, the Christians are gathering to worship here, and now you come. You are God's answer. We are so excited for this."

Wow.

Two days from now, Willow Creek Deutschland will hold the first ever women's conference in Germany. It has a slightly different connotation here than in the states - at least half the people attending the conference will be men - definitely no Women of Faith type event. :) But the topic for the conference is the role of women in ministry, which has never been addressed so publicly here before. And as someone said yesterday, "After this, everything will be different."

How cool is it that God has allowed me to be here for such a time as this, to see and to pray in a watershed moment in the life of His church? I am humbled and awed to have some small role to play in this part of the story.

More About Love

2007-11-01T18:55:00.000-05:00

This post is actually a sort of response to Josh's last post; it's not really, because I wrote it awhile ago, but it is, because it came to mind as I've been thinking about the love Christ showed/shows us. So, as a result of that weird shift in the time continuum - here are my thoughts on God's thoughts on love.

Love is patient when it could be easily frustrated.

Love is kind when it could have chosen to be cruel.

Love isn't envious of the blessings of others even in the absence of blessing to itself.

Love is humble and quiet, not boastful and self-centered.

Love chooses to forget the wrongs done to it; love refuses to stay angry, even though it has every right to be upset.

Love rejoices with everything that is good and true and right in the world, and weeps over that which is not.

Love protects fiercely, trusts unyieldingly even when it doesn't understand, hopes unswervingly against all odds, and perseveres no matter what.

Love refuses to fail.

Love embraces grace, extends it, doesn't give up.

Love recognizes it can't be earned.

Love mourns sin and celebrates repentance.

Love is meek enough - gentle enough - to both hear and tell the truth.

Love hungers for righteousness.

Love extends mercy.

Love is pure in heart.

Love seeks peace, at great cost to itself.

Love will not shy away from persecution of any kind, because its purpose is greater than any temporary pain.

Love is...Love.*

(He is also known as Jesus.)

* 1 Corinthians 13 and Matthew 5: 1-12

Reflecting on True Love

2007-10-30T00:49:00.000-05:00

I was struck by a line in a song I was listening to as I was driving home late the other night. One of the lines from the song said, “The earth was shaking in the dark, all creation felt the father’s broken heart, tears were filling heaven’s eyes the day that true love died.” That one line, “ALL creation felt the father’s broken heart.” God loved his son so much that the whole Earth shook and felt it. ALL of creation. We nailed his son to a cross in a humiliating, miserably painful death.Now think about that, how would you react to that?

We’ve all loved someone, and in many cases that someone has been mistreated or harmed by another and in most cases we probably reacted in a vengeful way. Yet God didn’t. This turned me to thinking about the passage in Matthew when Jesus is praying and asks the Father to let us be with him. What if Jesus hadn’t prayed that prayer, how would God have reacted to the death on the cross? We know that God is love and this proves how much he loved us. Enough that his wrath didn’t come down on us to the point of destroying us and any chance of salvation forever.

He sent his son here to give us salvation and knew what would have to happen in order for us to receive that salvation. But it still didn’t change the pain he felt when Christ breathed his last. Love is evident all over the cross.From the Father God's pain ripping the Earth open to the prayer Jesus prayed asking the father to be with us for all of eternity. Stop and consider how amazing that is. That’s God’s grace, and that’s true love.

Choose Life

2007-10-24T22:13:00.000-05:00

"Today I have given you the choice between life and death, between blessings and curses. Now I call on heaven and earth to witness the choice you make. Oh, that you would choose life, so that you and your descendants might live! You can make this choice by loving the LORD your God, obeying Him, and committing yourself firmly to Him. This is the key to your life. And if you love and obey the LORD, you will live long in the land the LORD swore to give your ancestors Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob." - Deuteronomy 30:19-20 (NLT)

This is the passage on which Mark started his message, and I've been thinking about it a lot over the past couple of days. We really do have choices - dozens, hundreds of them sometimes, every day. When Jake tells me to say "pickle bucket," do I say it just because he said to? Tall carmel latte or venti carmel apple cider? Bible study or check my email? (ouch.) Say something or keep my mouth shut? The choices vary in importance, but every choice we make (turn left or turn right at the next light?) impacts the future in ways we can't see from the present. So knowing God's word is important, and trusting Him is essential, if we want to live a good life and know that we lived a life chasing Jesus faithfully.

"And love God, your God, listening obediently to him, firmly embracing him." - this is how Eugene Peterson paraphrases part of the verses above in the Message. This just reinforced to me the connection between obeying God and loving Him. Obedience is an act of love - even when, or even especially when, we don't understand why God is asking us to do something. It's arguably an act of love when we choose to obey when we don't want to. Especially if we do it asking God to change our hearts so that we have "the want to" to follow Him. As Mark said Monday night - it's worship to make wise choices.

Reading verses in context is something I try to do often, so I went back to the entire chapter of Deuteronomy 30 and read it. I'd encourage you, if you get a chance this week, to read Deuteronomy 27:1 - 32:13 - it's really interesting. (It's God's Word.) :) But a few verses jumped out at me from chapter 30 tonight as I read:

"Now what I am commanding you today is not too difficult for you or beyond your reach. It is not up in heaven, so that you have to ask, "Who will ascend into heaven to get it and proclaim it to us so we may obey it?" Nor is it beyond the sea, so that you have to ask, "Who will cross the sea to get it and proclaim it to us so we may obey it?" No, the word is very near you; it is in your mouth and in your heart so you may obey it." - Deuteronomy 30:11-14

or as the Message puts it: "This commandment that I'm commanding you today isn't too much for you, it's not out of your reach. It's not on a high mountain—you don't have to get mountaineers to climb the peak and bring it down to your level and explain it before you can live it. And it's not across the ocean—you don't have to send sailors out to get it, bring it back, and then explain it before you can live it. No. The word is right here and now—as near as the tongue in your mouth, as near as the heart in your chest. Just do it!"

Whatever it is that God is asking you to do, it isn't impossible. It might be hard. He never promised this race would be easy. But it is not impossible. For you, by yourself, sheer will power - nope, you probably can't do it, whatever it is. But with God, all things are possible. (Matthew 19:25-26)

"The word is right here and now - as near as the tongue in your mouth, as near as the heart in your chest. JUST DO IT!!!!"

For further reflection, check out James 1:22-25, as well. May God give us the grace to make wise choices, to choose life over death, and to truly be doers of the Word. Amen.

Observations and Reflections

2007-10-24T19:56:00.000-05:00

So I have noticed at times I definitely can ramble, and you know what - I don't care. I've really been processing what the title of this blogspot is and it dawned on me: I never really thought about what it truly means to chase Jesus. I really love the way that sounds and the way you can imagine that. "Following Jesus" sounds cool and all, but you get the sense that you are right behind Him and going at a smooth and steady pace, not breaking a sweat or anything. "Chasing Jesus" however, sounds like a fast-paced trying just to get closer to Jesus. I imagine running at full pace and just being able to get a glimpse of Jesus. Just a continuous motion that (if you are truly seeking) you don't slow down but want to run that much faster.

Have you ever noticed that when you are running or going towards something, it's so much sweeter when there is a goal, objective, or prize at the end? Again, it never really dawned on me that our prize is at the end of our race and we need to be vigorously going after that prize. Dehydration and fatigue might set in, but the next cool-off station is around the bend. The chase for Jesus is not a sprint in which you get ultimate fulfillment. It is an on-going pursuit in which as you pass an obstacle, you feel great, get some Gatorade, and keep going. And then you start off again. We will always be chasing the prize until we see Jesus face to face. Our pursuit is never ending but our Reward is abundant.

The race we have been set forth on may put obstacles in our path; it might even send us on a detour. However, if we keep running the race to gain the ultimate prize we are well on our way. However, we also need to remember that we might need to help others on their path and that if they stumble, we need to get them up. This prize is better when all make it to the end and ALL are there to celebrate. A party isn't too much fun when you are by yourself. If we are going to "Rock the House," we'd better have a good strong force with us.

As I just think this week and reflect on the race I have been on, I can definitely say I have fallen into a manhole a couple of times. I just had to get right back up again, wipe off the sludge that was slowing me down, and get back to running. You think Nike makes a good shoe? They've got nothing on the good old B-I-B-L-E -- best shoe you could possibly use to keep your head in the race and keep your feet pumping. That's the brand for me. I hope you all remember that the chase for Jesus is a full force drive, not a Sunday walk by the beach. Keep your momentum and drive during the week; get refueled whenever you can. And don't forget your Nikes (your Bible) at home. God is Love, and where there is Love, grace can be found.

God Bless
Benjamin C. Volling

LOVE LOVE and LOVE some More

2007-10-18T20:33:00.000-05:00

The thought of how to love someone else never really occurred to me until I would say this week. It is unbelievable that Jesus loved everyone; it's just amazing that he had a genuine love and concern for every single person on this earth. What really provoked this thought was I was like WOW, I barely like half the people I talk with in a given day, let alone LOVE them. Why is it that Jesus could do that, and yet we can not? We get annoyed at a way a person drives, eats, talks, or even looks. Why is it that Jesus did not care and just gave of himself? I really pondered this week as I was talking with people and just seeing how I was not showing God's love at all. In fact, I was judging people and specifically trying to point out their flaws. God is love and if we speak his name we need to be speaking in love. I really turned a 180 this week about half way through and just said, let me have grace and for me to see people through Jesus' eyes. The two things that rang through my head are the two greatest things that Jesus said, and as a person once called it, GC squared - which is the Great Commandment and The Great Commission.
Matthew 22:37-40 "Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and soul, and mind. This is the First and gret commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself. On these two commandments hand all the law and the prophets."
Mathew 28: 19-20 "Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teach them to obey everything I have commanded you."

These passages speak volumes to me and they do so because if we do the first part, the second part will follow. If Jesus wanted us to love him and to love others, wouldn't it make sense that we would want other people to do the same? The saying "kill them with a smile" - it's wrong. I would rather say, "Save them with a smile." A smile can already show a person you care about them. Try to smile at a person and have them not smile back; it's pretty hard not to have them do that. God is about love and if we love one another unconditionally, whether that person is saved or a satanist, we are following what our Lord wants. Chasing Jesus isn't always the easy task but I know there are people in my life that if I loved them and truly loved them, that I could be such a better witness. We fall into that society in which we always have to be better and are always looking out for ourselves. Again, what does that get us except on our knees asking forgiveness, and going back to the same routine? We need to break out of the mold and become the witnesses God has called us to be. To be a witness is to be that light that shines and shows love. I have truly found the way to love another person. GRACE!! That's all you need, baby. God made that person to be who they are; by hating them, you are just smacking God in his face. If we are going to save this world one person at a time, it is through mad love. If that is the greatest commandment, I think that would be something pretty important. Now showing love can be done in many ways, saying you are cool, talking to a person and actually letting them talk and you listen, hanging out with them, making a sacrifice to spend time with them, and my favorite is just telling them that you love them.

My mom was shocked the other day when I did two things that I haven't done in over 3 months. I went to Chicago and just talked with her for the day and told her I loved her. I had no clue it had been that long since i did either one of those. It really put things in perspective for me. If I'm not showing my mom love, who else am I not showing love to? My life can get rather busy sometimes; however, my life is for Jesus and that means this worldly stuff needs to go away and I need to keep my focus and loving people mad style. My job is important, but how much more of a witness could I be if I was showing Love to every person that walked through my doors. It was amazing to see how by the end of this week how people at work could see a difference in how I handled people and it was cool that I was back to my roots of mad dog loving people. Remember what we are called to do. This is not a sprint; it is a marathon, and we need to be well trained and do this slowly. So why don't you go out today and "save someone with a smile"? You just might be able to see them smile back at you in heaven. The fields are plentiful but the workers are few. Go harvest your field today and run the course God has laid out for you.

Benjamin C Volling

Old Men in Smalltowns with Bad Breath; Pt. 2

2007-10-16T19:10:00.000-05:00

During a recent quiet time with God I began questioning my current circumstances. Not in a griping or complaining “why me” manner, but rather am I doing what God has called me to do? About a month and a half ago I began a new job that during that whole pre-job process looked like a complete answer to prayers. Along with that it seemed to be an opportunity that looked to move me into the next stage of my life. However, as I said I’m now a month and a half in and wondering what is it I’m doing here? How am I making a difference for God’s kingdom? Sure I may be a half way friendly face who is helpful and encouraging to those I am in contact with for a brief moment. But in reality I’ll never see them again and how is that keeping souls out of hell?

God has given me a passion for missions and yet I feel like my occupation isn’t doing that, at least not blatantly. The reality of the situation is that I might not be blatantly keeping souls out of hell, but I am representing God’s love (or at least trying to) and God is developing patience in me, which is a much needed tool for future missions endeavors. So many times I’ve been told of the importance of wisdom in anything, and wisdom isn’t something that’s inherited overnight, it’s gained over time. Which is again frustrating and demands patience. Also, I work with many lost folks who I pray might see a glimpse of Jesus’ love in me.

Often through my impatience (there’s that word again in some form) I want to be the missionary now and forget what true missions’ looks like. Every one of us is called to missions if we know and have accepted Jesus as our personal savior. We’re called to be like him and what did he do but live a life devoted to loving and spreading God’s love. We can do that anywhere whether it’s in a hut in Tanzania, a bus stop in Ireland, or our Lake County Circuit court branch in Mundelein. That’s what true missions looks like.

Worship - when you feel like an alien

2007-10-15T14:20:00.000-05:00

(HT: The Ongoing Adventures of ASBO Jesus)

Can you relate? Why or why not?

What do you do on days when this is what it feels like?

Worship - awe of Him

2007-10-12T14:10:00.000-05:00

"Your wickedness will punish you; your backsliding will rebuke you. Consider then and realize how evil and bitter it is for you when you forsake the Lord your God and have no awe of Him." declares the Lord, the Lord Almighty. ~Jer 2:19

I've just started reading Jeremiah this week and it is wild. Jeremiah is surrounded by a nation of corruption and rebellion to God and God tells him to stand up and be a prophet to that people. Delivering God's wrath and His desire to rebuild them.
"See, today I appoint you over nations and kingdoms to uproot and tear down, to destroy and overthrow, to build and to plant." Jer 1:10

Today I read the top verse, 2:19, and God hit me with a thought about worship. God says that it's not only evil and bitter of us, but evil and bitter for us to forsake Him. Like we were created to worship Him and when we hold that back from Him it actually destroys who we are. Our undoing is our own doing. He won't force us to worship Him, so He'll never force us to be healthy and alive and safe and fulfilled.
Maybe we feel like he should sometimes, it would seem easier. Or maybe not force us but at least ask us. But He doesn't, He does something different, He commands it. The truth is that God's presence, more than God's person, commands our worship. He will be worshipped. ("the stones will cry out." Luke 19:40) My prayer is that I'd not be offended by the command but I'd respond with "awe of Him."

Repentance

2007-10-09T18:50:00.000-05:00

Hey, everyone. Still chewing over Mark's message from last night, but ran across these passages on another blog tonight and thought they might help us process through the whys of repentance, beyond just
"i should" - it's good stuff, whether we're on the receiving end of a tough talk, or need to have one with someone. (And if we're neither place right now, it's a pretty sure bet we probably will be someday, so it's still good stuff.) :)

If you missed Torch last night, keep an eye out on the Torch website for Mark's message - it should be up in a week or two. In the meantime, I hope these verses are helpful to you, and I'd love to hear your thoughts on them. Please comment! (See the sidebar to your right if you don't know how yet.) :)

Each passage below is linked to a page where you'll find 5 alternate translations or paraphrases of the verses. I often find it helpful when I'm studying to look at different translations, as a shift in wording can help me see something in the passage that I might not otherwise have seen. The passages written out here are all from the New Living Translation.

Joel 2:12-14

That is why the Lord says, “Turn to me now, while there is time. Give me your hearts. Come with fasting, weeping, and mourning. Don’t tear your clothing in your grief, but tear your hearts instead.” Return to the Lord your God, for he is merciful and compassionate, slow to get angry and filled with unfailing love. He is eager to relent and not punish. Who knows? Perhaps he will give you a reprieve, sending you a blessing instead of this curse. Perhaps you will be able to offer grain and wine to the Lord your God as before.

Isaiah 57:15-19

The high and lofty one who lives in eternity, the Holy One, says this: “I live in the high and holy place with those whose spirits are contrite and humble. I restore the crushed spirit of the humble and revive the courage of those with repentant hearts. For I will not fight against you forever; I will not always be angry. If I were, all people would pass away— all the souls I have made. I was angry, so I punished these greedy people. I withdrew from them, but they kept going on their own stubborn way. I have seen what they do, but I will heal them anyway! I will lead them. I will comfort those who mourn, bringing words of praise to their lips. May they have abundant peace, both near and far,” says the Lord, who heals them.

Hosea 6:1-3

“Come, let us return to the Lord. He has torn us to pieces; now he will heal us. He has injured us; now he will bandage our wounds. In just a short time he will restore us, so that we may live in his presence. Oh, that we might know the Lord! Let us press on to know him. He will respond to us as surely as the arrival of dawn or the coming of rains in early spring.”

Hosea 14:1-4

Return, O Israel, to the Lord your God, for your sins have brought you down. Bring your confessions, and return to the Lord. Say to him, “Forgive all our sins and graciously receive us, so that we may offer you our praises. Assyria cannot save us, nor can our warhorses. Never again will we say to the idols we have made, ‘You are our gods.’ No, in you alone do the orphans find mercy.”

The Lord says, “Then I will heal you of your faithlessness; my love will know no bounds, for my anger will be gone forever."

Matthew 4:17

From then on, Jesus began to preach, “Repent of your sins and turn to God, for the Kingdom of Heaven is near."

So what can these verses teach us about why we should repent?

I shall not speak of evil (nor of good)

2007-10-08T09:15:00.000-05:00

Work is a very trying place for me spiritually. Gossip runs rampant, customers are ignorant, and employees are irritating at best. It is very easy to succumb to the daily grind and start letting the pressures of work get to me. I try very hard to avoid the gossip and keep my tongue from speaking badly of certain customers and most employees.

I know full well that the workplace can be a great forum to speak the name of Jesus Christ and His gift of grace, mercy, and love. However, I am always too busy trying to complete the tasks assigned to me or the hold my tongue from speaking slander. This may very well be the devil in trying to distract me from the Word of God. But I complete my assignments and I do not join in with any hurtful words.

In the meanwhile, I am all too aware of the fact that I am not speaking of the Good News to anybody. This has an impact on me because I know that my life is not to complete tasks given to me by my bosses. It is for the Lord. And until He returns, it is our duty to spread The Message.

To make matters worse, this past week I have been reading Jesus Freaks by dc Talk. This has put a greater awareness on me, that while we live in a free country, able to speak the Word of the Lord without fear of reprimand from our neighbors, that I have not been spreading the Good News in my circle of influence. This has weighed heavily on me.

God, in His great wisdom and love, has shown me it is never too late. This weekend, I spent a great deal of time reading the Bible, and He led me to Psalm 39. David, a great leader and man of God, said

I said, "I will watch my ways
and keep my tongue from sin;
I will put a muzzle on my mouth
as long as the wicked are in my presence."
But when I was silent and still,
not even saying anything good,
my anguish increased.
My heart grew hot within me,
and as I meditated, the fire burned;
then I spoke with my tongue

God knows well enough our own hearts. He has already spoken, well in advance, about every situation we would face in life. God has spoken to me through his Word. I go with a new strength and vigor for God. Please pray for me, and others, that we are able to speak words of life to people that I work with, and strangers that I may meet.

Also pray for the people who will be starting the Life 2.0 series in their homes to bring new believers to Christ. They are reaching out to those around them, so may the Lord give them words that will pierce their hearts.

For Your Name and Your Renown

2007-10-01T14:37:00.000-05:00

I've been thinking about the words to Salvation Is Here this afternoon, especially the second verse:

Hear the sound of the generations
Making loud their freedom song
All in all that the world might know your Name
We're gonna be alright*

I pray a lot of the same things, well, a lot, at Torch - and that's actually pretty intentional (and why is a topic for a later post) - and one of the things you'll hear me pray a lot is that God's Name would be made famous in our lives, and that the stuff He does in our lives at Torch will send us to the ends of the earth for the sake of His glory. It's a prayer that echoes a song Christy Nockels sang that I can't for the life of me remember any line to except "and see the greatness of His renown." (If anyone knows what song that is, please tell me; it's driving me nuts!)

It also echoes Isaiah 28:6 - "Yes, Lord, walking in the way of Your laws, we wait for You; Your name and renown are the desire of our hearts."

What does the verse say we're doing? "Walking in the way of Your laws" - or, to put it more simply - we're worshiping God.

Why? Because "Your Name and renown are the desire of our hearts." We want people to know this God we worship - and the way we tell them is by worshiping.

Kind of puts a new twist on evangelism, doesn't it?

Look again at the lyrics to Salvation Is Here --

Hear the sound of the generations
Making loud their freedom song

How do we make loud our freedom song? Well, one way is by singing at the top of our lungs at Torch - but another is by living our lives in such a way that our freedom in Christ is demonstrated to those around us...

all in all, that the world might know Your Name...

And THAT is the point.

Worship and evangelism are inextricably entwined. People see our worship (whether at church or by our lives lived in devotion to Him) and they can't miss the reality of God's presence. As we make His name famous in our lives, He'll live up to His reputation as the God who saves, and the lost will be able to join us in singing "Salvation is here, and He lives in me."

And together, we will all be able to say in truth - "we're gonna be alright."

*Salvation is Here -- words and music by Joel Houston -- © 2004 Hillsong Publishing

Old Men in Small Towns with Bad Breath

2007-09-25T19:23:00.000-05:00

Can any of you relate to this? God has clearly called you to something and you’re just as clearly running from it. Maybe it’s stepping out and befriending a person in particular or maybe it’s larger than that and God wants you to serve in some capacity. This is normal for Christians so don’t feel like the odd one. For me, I know that God has called me to ministry/missions but it seems as though every opportunity I get I’m running from that. I’m often reminded of the story of Jonah, and how he ran from God’s calling. Jonah refused to go and preach to a people he saw as a lost cause. And so he ran. God chased him until eventually Jonah had no choice but to face what God was challenging him to do. As a result of his stubborn running Jonah endured some heartache along the way. I’m not saying that God’s going to use a whale swallowing you and you spending three days in the stomach of said whale to prove a point. But he will eventually force you to make a decision, and the hard lesson I still fail to learn is that in the grand scheme of things, God’s way is much better and contains less hurt and pain. So many times I've tried to justify running from him in my own way, often to the point of even denying the call that God placed on my own life. The truth is, how fortunate are we that God wants to use us? Whether it's volunteering to help out at the Edge or asking someone you barely know to coffee, it's amazing that God would even want to use us in any way. So, how can you relate to Jonah?

And They Had All Things In Common

2007-09-25T08:23:00.000-05:00

Last weekend I found myself in an unexpected situation. I was visiting a friend, Jeremiah, in Ypsilanti, Michigan, and he was in the process of finding a church. He goes to Eastern Michigan, and had found what he believed to be the church he'd heard about that many students went to. We pull into the parking lot, a few students mingling around, and start to head to the church. We were 9 minutes early, and like so many other services I've been to, people didn't actually show up until about 1 minute before the service started. I still can't fathom how people manage to time it so well.

We walk in and a woman greets us and lets us know we're early. "Only by 9 minutes, though" I say, and ask where we're supposed to be, as this is our first time here. She points down the hall and says the sanctuary is down there, so we go in and take a seat in the fourth row.

We're saying "Hi" to everyone we pass, and a few people come to us, somehow knowing we're new to the church (it was rather small, so this was no surprise), introducing themselves and finding out a little about us. Everyone is extremely friendly, but I'm having a very difficult time with names. In fact, it seems like everyone we've met is Chinese.

Then we're handed a program, and sure enough, it's a Chinese Lutheran church, with half the program being in Chinese. For a second I considered suggesting to Jeremiah we find a 11 o'clock service somewhere, feeling that we were imposing, both of us obviously not Chinese. That quickly went away with the realization that God had most certainly led us here, and I wanted to know what He was going to show us.

The service was amazing. The worship was amazing. There were some there who were singing in English, some in Chinese, all in unison with the hymnal having both languages to the same music. The people, especially the congregation, not only were acceptant, but embraced us. There also wasn't a politically correct atmosphere, as though people were trying to ignore the differences, pretend they weren't there. There was one moment where a person said something in Chinese and a translator standing up with him said, "Is there anyone new here today?" Jeremiah and I raised our hands, and there was some unashamed laughter, including from the people at the podium. It was remarkably comforting for me, and, I think, for Jeremiah. Yes, we were different, obviously so, yet it made no difference. We were brothers, and in Christ, no matter the differences in language, skin tone, nationality, or even culture, we had all things in common.

Acts 2 contains a remarkable statement in verse 44:

"And all those who had believed were together and had all things in common"

Shortly after Pentecost, there were people from "every nation under heaven"(Acts 2:5). Nations, cultures, not even language could pose a barrier for the church, for the Truth Christ gave us. Many of us have never experienced that. Our culture in the Western world seems to tell us we need to be separate, that the cultural differences of even our neighbors, because of nothing more than their skin color, are too great to be able to do things as one. Yet, as this verse shows, we, under the banner of the cross, all of us who believe can be together and have all things in common, not only material, but all things.

The Worship Corner - Spirit and Truth

2007-09-21T20:02:00.000-05:00

The third definition of the word "corner" in Merriam-Webster's online dictionary is "a private, secret, or remote place" as in "a quiet corner of New England." I like that. I'm from New England, did you know that? (The accent comes out pretty strong when I'm super-excited or really mad about something.) About three weeks from now, there will be a spot on the Massachusetts turnpike as you're heading east where you will come around a corner, and you won't have even realized you were in the mountains until you see the view. There's a sheer drop on the far side of the guardrail, and all you'll be able to see beyond it are the glorious fall colors, and a few church steeples. It's breathtaking, and it feels like it goes on forever - both the view and the turn - and you'll be sorry when you're past it. You'll just want to stop and rest there for a minute, and soak it all in. (There is a spot to stop, but you'll need to know where to look for it.)

This is what I want our experience of worship to be. I don't always get a chance to say everything I'd like to about worship when I'm leading, but this is our chance to go a little deeper, and it is my hope that we will grow as a worshiping community as a result of these conversations. I want us to know how to stop and catch the view - to find that quiet, secret, and remote place where we can truly encounter God in a way that takes our breath away.

The Bible has a lot to say about worship. Check out this conversation between Jesus and a Samaritan woman at Jacob's well. There's a lot we could say about this passage, but I want to focus on a few specific verses: John 4:23-24.

Jesus says to the woman: "Yet a time is coming and has now come when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for they are the kind of worshipers the Father seeks. God is spirit, and his worshipers must worship in spirit and in truth."

I love how the Message puts it: "It's who you are and the way you live that count before God. Your worship must engage your spirit in the pursuit of truth. That's the kind of people the Father is out looking for: those who are simply and honestly themselves before him in their worship. God is sheer being itself—Spirit. Those who worship him must do it out of their very being, their spirits, their true selves, in adoration."

Those who are simply and honestly themselves before him in their worship...

So here's our first discussion topic: How does this work itself out practically for you? What does it mean to come before God simply and honestly yourself?

In context, Jesus is answering the woman's question about place: she wants to know, where's the right place to worship? Essentially He tells her, "it doesn't matter nearly as much as you think it does. You can worship anywhere, anytime. It's your heart that matters."

John Wesley says in his comments on verse 24 that worshiping in spirit and truth means we bring everything into God's presence - "all our tempers, thoughts, words, and actions." (The word "tempers" here means emotions.) It means that no matter how we feel, or what we've done, we recognize that God is worthy of our worship, and we worship Him - with everything we've got.

So what does that look like?