Tuesday, July 15, 2008

the final days in fiji

well, exactly one week and two hours from right now, i'll be boarding a plane headed to LAX. that moment i believe is going to be bittersweet for me, probably more bitter. i don't want to leave fiji. this country has changed my life in so many ways, and i know an emotional reaction to a country is all part of the process of missions but there is so much work to do here and the people are so open to God's word. now is the time to act here and i don't want to leave.

through this whole fiji process, God has proven himself faithful over and over. providing the money for the trip, my passport, the people he's brought into my life on this trip, and the way he's orchestrated so many different events. i'm so humbled by this love and faithfulness, and how he can use someone so unworthy and incapable like myself.

i'm praying now that God would keep me from being an emotional mess when i get back to the states. i really don't want to leave, everywhere i go i meet people and they're openly friendly people. just today, i was leading a group on OJT. OJT stands for on the job training. i am given two people to teach how to share the gospel, and then we actually go out and they watch me do it.

today we were dropped off in front of a house, and thought, why not go into the house we were dropped off at. inside were two women, a mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. they invited us in happily and we began to sit and talk with them. once the conversation was directed towards God i saw God was presenting an opportunity to share His story with them. i began sharing the gospel with them and would stop and ask them if they had questions after each step. i was heartbroken each time as they would ask questions because they had been raised in different denominational beliefs or no church at all, and both were quite confused.

i shared my testimony and they both seemed moved, then i asked them if they wanted to know for sure that they would spend eternity with Jesus. they did, so we prayed and they accepted Christ. they were crying and i was trying not to, and they said that they would like to know how to share with their husbands who were lost. so before i left i tried to quickly teach them how to share the gospel with their husbands. they were so loving and honest with me it was amazing. i'll never forget them.

my point isn't to say, "hey look at me. look at what i did." my point is that i am nothing and look at what God can do with me, look at what he can do with each one of us. many of you know my story and the sin i came out of years ago, but yet God still wants me. instead of asking why like i used to, now i just let him. i want to encourage you all to do the same. instead of asking why do you want to use me or how can you use me, just let him. the time is now, not tomorrow. this world needs Christ and they're all crying out to him. this isn't just christian-cliche it's real.

God will take you places you never dreamed if you just begin surrendering to him, and give him your life fully. 5 months ago i had no idea and couldn't imagine being in another country, sharing the gospel with other people. but here i am because God wants me, and i can guarantee he wants you. maybe not in fiji or some other country, but where you are. do it.

i pray that you would seek him now and begin to figure out how you can begin to be used by God. i love you and miss you all.

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